Setting goals for the new year needn’t be overwhelming. Using intentional living as a guide, you can welcome a brand-new year that’s full of possibilities.
It doesn’t matter if you’ve clicked on this blog post with your notebook poised for ink, or if you’ve thrown a concoction of words into a search engine after a spark of thought to make this year different. The mere act of contemplation surrounding setting goals for the new year is enough to bring about something magical in the months yet to be written. It’s the first step, regardless of the year you’re reading this, and a journey that we can go on together.
My journey with goal setting
If you’re a regular reader of my blog, you might recall my cry for help last year, when it became apparent that my stringent, robotic approach to conquering my new year health goals led me to breaking point. It’s through this story that I reflected, tried again, failed and repeated, and continued to make mistakes in my approach to learn a valuable lesson.
Even as someone who is passionate about intentional living, I get it wrong. I embark on journeys that aren’t in alignment with my values. I lack confidence and feel fear that I won’t achieve what I set out to. I don’t always let gratitude be my guide. But, it’s through the growing pains and the tears that, often, we make our biggest personal discoveries.
My journey taught me that despite my meticulous attention to detail down to the seconds, millilitres and single digits – the moment I needed to be out of bed by, how many litres of water I consumed, and reaching the number ‘10,000’ on my Apple watch – I was unhappy, stressed and teetering on the edge of a breakdown. I wondered, with envy, how the day-in-the-life routines of girls on TikTok were portraying the lifestyle I sought to be easy. Wake up, journal, go to the gym, do skincare, write a novel, be a boss b*tch at work, make a healthy dinner, make a viral Instagram reel, read 20 pages and go to bed early. I couldn’t do it. I didn’t feel good enough.
It took the coming of spring for me to understand that the faux pas wasn’t mine, but rather, a combination of factors that led to one inevitable outcome. First, taking on too much; second, not letting nature be my guide; third, not giving myself the grace to be human; and fourth, forgetting who I am and what I stand for.
Setting end of year goals
Since my discovery, I have thought deeply about new year goals and explored a method of goal-setting that, I am finding, creates harmony between being gentle in the making of goals and being brave. Goals aren’t about moving mountains, but rather, climbing them. Some steps are harder than others, and we slow down. A fear of heights can creep in, and we conquer it. It feels yin and yang, but being gentle and brave can coincide to create a challenge that hits the sweet spot in setting goals for the new year – goals that can be achieved without great sacrifice, but require personal growth. The challenge isn’t in the goals we choose, either, but in the level of dedication we give to the ones that matter.
Have no more than five one-year goals
It’s tempting to get carried away, I know. The turn of the clock to a brand new year can bring a sense of readiness for renewal – to let go of old thought patterns, habits and behaviours to create a new identity through resolutions. New year, new me. But, the most important lesson of all is not to stretch, push or rush to create an action plan. It can lead to the place I ended up in.
My personal discovery has led me to the magic number of five one-year goals, spanning multiple categories. Perhaps you have multiple new year business goals in mind, or end of year goals to replenish your savings account. You could dream of attending your first parkrun, or hosting an unforgettable party for a loved one’s milestone birthday. The five goals can be anything your heart desires – it doesn’t matter if they are specific, measurable or smart goals, even. The important element is the number of goals – the piece of advice that, year on year, I continuously ignored and misunderstood, until now.
When you have chosen your five goals, any other goals or ideas that emerge from the back of your mind must be ignored until the five goals are complete. The One Thing by Gary W. Keller and Jay Papasan supports this notion, stating that in order to complete goals effectively, a person must complete their one thing before anything else, aside from food and exercise.
Gary and Jay’s coaching is profound, mainly because it pinpoints precisely the reason I fall. Historically, I’ve etched end of year goals into my planner with a sparkle in my eye alongside an elaborate plan to accomplish them. All the while, picking at the other offerings in the world outside the pages. Join Slimming World. Subscribe to a magazine. Collect vintage clothes. Do 75 Hard. Now, I know that I have to stop myself. Resist the urge. Go back to my magic five.
The beauty is, by hyper-focusing on five goals and allowing no intruders, I have become much more intentional about the goals I have chosen for the year. They aren’t born from a fleeting thought, nor are they devised from a quick sit-down with my notebook. I have had to become crystal clear on the goals that are most important to me. In fact, I crossed out one of my choices before signing the dotted line to the universe and replacing it with a goal that, while not as fun, I realised is imperative to my year. It must be completed beyond any others.
If you can’t decide on which goals to prioritise, it might be easier to reframe your thinking – which of the end of year goals on your list would you feel comfortable dropping until you have accomplished your five goals? Open your heart and see where it leads you.
Give yourself space and time
I say it with kindness, but I don’t recommend listening to hustle culture in the realms of goal-setting. You don’t need to reinvent your life by 1 January and wake up as a changed person. It’s 13 January as I write this, and I’m still finalising my end of year goals. I won’t be full steam ahead in January.
My blog post about learning to adopt slow living might help you to slow down and reflect. In fact, it’s focused on my reflections on setting rushed goals last January. I also recommend a book, Wintering by Katherine May, that explores the challenges of winter, and how we can rest and retreat in the darkest season.
Still, by all means, if your goals are prominent in mind as the clock strikes midnight amid the calls of ‘Happy New Year’, feel free to lovingly take steps towards achieving them. I appreciate that sometimes, we just know. If not, allow yourself the space and time to reflect on how you want your year to look, feel and be. Often, as the clouds begin to lift, the evenings seep into light and sprouts emerge from the ground, we gain the most clarity on setting goals for the new year. Embrace the slower pace and listen to your intuition.
Find acceptance
Perhaps your story is similar to mine last January – you attempted to tackle the year in full force without success, and are left to pick up the pieces of failed goals. It can feel disheartening, but the kindest thing you can do for yourself is find acceptance. As I said, I have made the same mistakes, and it’s OK to feel them deeply.
If you’re in the throes of overcommitment, you have permission to wave the flag and accept that it was too much, too soon. Use stillness to reflect until you’re ready to rise again with end of year goals that are loving, achievable and in alignment with who you are.
Is it what you truly want?
Look at your list of goals and visualise them being here. Is it the reality you’ve always dreamed of? Or, as I have fallen victim to in previous years, is it the reality that’s sponsored by your favourite influencer? I have plans to write a separate blog post about external influences, as it’s a topic that I’m incredibly passionate about. But, for now, I can say that it’s always best to lead with your heart. That way, you’ll remain on the path that’s meant for you.
To all my readers, I wish you a beautiful year full of love, peace and prosperity. If you’re willing, I would love to hear how you’re setting goals for the new year in the comments.
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