Modern homemaking | How to be a homemaker and work full time

The homemaker is the heart of the home and passionate about creating a nurturing environment. An operations director of sorts, the homemaker’s responsibilities aren’t limited and span beyond the colours painted on the walls or the workmanship of the kitchen cabinets. Rather, the homemaker focuses on a collection of duties, from managing the domestic rituals to directing the household menu.

“I believe that first and foremost, being intentional with your time is the key to succeeding in homemaking with a full-time job. Honour your beliefs and values before developing a rigid schedule.”

The full-time homemaker has evolved in correlation with societal development, too. Albeit delightful, I held a dated vision of a woman baking sourdough in a kitchen full of children, tending to chickens in her yard and wearing Mary Jane’s with an apron on (at least, that’s how I stereotyped it). Of course, this isn’t the modern-day reality for most.

In this homemaking guide, I share how to be a homemaker and work full time, including my story, what qualifies for the position and how to fulfil homemaking duties while working outside the home.

My story of becoming a homemaker

My boyfriend and I bought our first house in 2022. Moving from a one-bedroom rented apartment on a busy road in Zone 2 London, we were giddy about the prospect of moving into a two-bedroom terraced house in Zone 5 with an abundance of space and possibility in comparison. Having rented our previous homes, I felt immense gratitude to be moving into a home that we could call our own, right down to the prospect of putting a shelf on the wall.

I soon learnt a humbling lesson, though. Home improvement accounts on social media left me feeling behind in our endeavours to decorate the house to the nines. With mismatched furniture, hairline cracks on the walls and bodge jobs coming to light from the previous owner, it was far from the idyllic perception I initially held of our first home. The gratitude diminished and the overwhelm took its place, and I faced what I perceived to be a near-impossible project.

Finding homemaking

I found intentional living through a YouTuber, Living The Life You Love, and her content inspired me to think differently about our home. She cast a light on the intentionality of tending to the home and her joy in being a homemaker. Her book, An Intentional Life, is an inspiring read, too.

It wasn’t long until I adopted the lifestyle myself. I began to see myself as the homemaker I envisioned when I was a child. It’s funny, thinking back to my childhood pastimes of circling furniture in the Argos catalogue and imagining cooking dinner and washing the plates in my future kitchen. Now, 20 years later, this is my reality. I’m responsible for the meals on the kitchen table, from menu planning to food shopping and cooking.

My journey to becoming a homemaker has been as much of a journey in self-discovery, too. As a 29-year-old woman living in the capital, I felt the societal pressure that I should be living my life differently, perhaps, partying until the early hours of the morning or working in the senior leadership team of a trendy agency. It took a lot of confidence to confess that a lifestyle of this kind wasn’t in my interest. The music vibrating through the floorboards of the flat we previously rented was enough to clarify that. When I think of those days, the gratitude for our home comes flooding back.

What qualifies as a homemaker?

When I first heard the term, “homemaker”, I dismissed it as being far removed from my reality. I thought, what is the difference between a homemaker and a housewife? Images of a picture-perfect housewife would come flashing through my mind, and, considering I’m not yet married, don’t have children and work full time, I certainly didn’t consider myself to be in this category.

However, I discovered that a homemaker wasn’t the same as a housewife and understood that, despite its old-fashioned connotations, a homemaker is a neutral title for the person who runs the household. A homemaker’s responsibilities can include, but aren’t limited to, doing the laundry, shopping for groceries, cooking meals, overseeing maintenance in the home, setting and monitoring budgets, and even coordinating the household calendar. In addition, it has evolved to incorporate full-time work and equality in the home.

How to manage home and work

The most pertinent factor for the modern homemaker is finding time for homemaking with a full-time job. Rest assured, there isn’t a black-and-white job description for the position. It’s flexible and influenced by your preference.

Finding time for homemaking

Ask yourself, does it bring you peace to conduct homemaking while working outside the home?

As an intentional living advocate, I believe that first and foremost, being intentional with your time is the key to succeeding in homemaking with a full-time job. Honour your beliefs and values before developing a rigid schedule. If you treasure your time away from home to listen to the birds on your commute, participate in the office chatter and eat a packed lunch in the canteen with your favourite colleague, I wholeheartedly ask that you prioritise your freedom, sister!

That’s not to say that there’s a right or wrong way to practise how to be a homemaker and work full time, either. I often text my boyfriend on my lunch break to confess that I have dealt with admin relating to the home, whether that’s acquiring quotes for a project, managing a utility bill or booking an appointment. Truthfully, it provides me with a sense of pride to accomplish homemaking tasks, and lunchtime is often when I’m in the mood to get it done.

So, if it brings you peace to conduct homemaking work outside of the home, it’s possible to lighten the load. Managing your inbox to ensure household bills are paid, sending flowers to a family member for their birthday or requesting a quote from a plumber to repair the leaking tap can often be completed on your commute or lunch break. However, I reiterate that the duties of the working homemaker shouldn’t come before your well-being.

Homemaking ideas

Once you’ve established your boundaries, learning how to be a good homemaker often starts with building an overarching household plan. You can use a physical planner, such as the Deluxe Law of Attraction 12-Month Planner that I use, or a digital planner, such as Notion.so. In addition, a digital calendar like iCal or Google Calendar can be useful for sharing with members of your household. But, you might prefer to schedule appointments using a physical wall calendar that can be hung up from the pinboard in the kitchen. Ultimately, it’s important to choose the option that feels the most intentional for your lifestyle.

I recommend that you input homemaking duties in priority order. First, input the household’s obligatory duties, such as pre-agreed appointments and events. Second, input the day-to-day duties, such as sending birthday cards, cleaning the home, and completing the monthly budget and weekly grocery shopping. Third, input the desired duties that aren’t essential. This might include listing items for sale on Vinted or cleaning the washing machine detergent drawer.

Scheduling time to sit down with your planner and inbox is important, too. I spend one hour on Sunday evening reflecting on the previous week, and one hour during my Monday morning routine inputting my duties and ambitions for the week ahead, responding to emails, unsubscribing from promotional content and getting my inbox down to zero.

Sharing duties with your household

We’re blessed to live in a society that upholds freedom of choice. So, I don’t believe that any woman should be forced into a position of managing the home alongside a full-time job without help.

Remember, you’re doing a brilliant job. But, if you live with other people, it’s fair to delegate tasks for them to complete, too. Put them in charge of preparing dinner on the weekends, taking the bins out (indefinitely) or handling a task that’s been weighing on your mind. A problem shared is a problem halved, as they say.

If learning how to be a homemaker and work full time has been helpful, I’d love to hear how it’s benefited your homemaking routine in the comments or my inbox.

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